RE: The Lady On The Orange Line Platform

While exiting a sardine level crowded Orange Line train at North Station today I heard a woman extol "This is just unacceptable! How many days of crowded cars has it been like this?" Now I agree with this woman, but in the same way that a Massachusetts liberal can disapprove of the way President Obama is running the country, we can be greedy like that.

I'm no expert of the cost benefit analysis of public transit nor do I claim to understand the financial problems that plague the US public transportation sector but I do know that I can leave my house at 7:25 AM and arrive at my office at 8:05 AM for less $1.50  (plus whatever percentage of my taxes go to the MBTA) and I don't have to pay attention. If on bad weather days that takes a bit longer and its more crowded due to higher ridership then so be it. It's a fucking bargain at double the price.

I would gladly pay more money per trip if it meant faster trains, a more expansive system, extra tracks for express service, enclosed stations, expanded platforms for more cars per train, etc. But people like this woman, who hate higher taxes but love exceptional service, are not going to allow it.

Now I don't know this woman, but that wont stop me from pretending to know this woman. My guess is when she thinks of public transportation she thinks of something a little less of the quality than what you get for a hired car and at a fraction of the price. There is a reason why it costs me $40 to take a Taxi to Logan Airport and $1.70 (plus whatever percentage of my taxes go to the MBTA) to go by public transit. And that reason does not stem from a lack of effort by the MBTA its stems from the bizarre way we value the service.

The Interview That Got Away

On my way to the North End today to have lunch at Galleria Umberto's I decided to get off at the Government Center T stop and walk across City Hall Plaza. As it would happen at the same time I was walking across the plaza Councilman Flaherty and Sam Yoon were giving a press conference to a handful of reporters and television cameras about the absurd political scandal that is the email deletions at city hall.

I'll get into Flaherty, Yoon and the emails later, but what struck me was the proximity with I had found myself to someone I could have voted for and someone I have the chance to vote for in the future, something which has only happened to me once when I listened to Governor Deval Patrick speak at a house event in Gloucester. It's an interesting feeling being in the presence of someone you only see on TV screens and in Newspaper articles, who have positions and agendas that appear to be black and white. Then you meet the man (or in this case men) and he is not a robot, he is not unplugged and wheeled away when the interview is over. No they make small talk, shake hands, laugh, look awkward, even nervous. It's weird, or maybe it's normal. Either way they are like everyone else, just in a different situation.

Of course me being me I thought after the press conference was over the reporters would fan out and do an interview or two with a random bystander. Myself being the only bystander I thought I stood a pretty good chance of being interviewed. It was not to be. But you the reader should not suffer for journalistic reluctance so here I present to you the "Interview That Got Away":


Underling: First of all I would like to say to my mother as well as any potential employers out there I don' look like this all the time. I usually shave and walk around with my hair combed and clean clothes. Today is an anomaly.

Reporter: What brings you here today?

U: I was just heading over to the North End for some Arancini and Sicilian Pizza, I happened upon the press conference and decided to stick around just in case I got interviewed.

R: Do you go to school in Boston?

U: I studied political science at THE Northeastern University, but currently I work at Bartley's in Cambridge as a line cook, because of the economy of course.

R: As a student of Politics what is your take on this whole "Emailgate" thing?

U: First of all can we please just agree that nothing should have the ending "gate" on it any more?

R: Ummm....

U: I'll take that as a yes. But coming back to your point I think this whole thing is a non-issue, the emails if they contain anything of relevance have little to do with the day to day running of the city nor any of the real issue the city is facing. That being said this is a great issue for Councilman Flaherty and Mr. Yoon to jump on. On the one hand they can label the Mayor as out of touch and his staff as ill equipped to deal with the technological advancements being made in goverment. On the other hand they can label the Mayor as an obstructionist of the law, someone with something to hide, a crook.

R: How do you think the Mayor's camp has handled this so far?

U: Poorly. I mean they could have killed this early by simply firing Mr. Kineavy and appointing a special investigator who answered to the City Council and had full access to anything and everything. Instead the Secretary of State and the Attorney General are not competing for face time 0n the issue and the Flaherty - Yoon campaign does not have to make us care about issues, they simply just need to express their outrage and demand accountability. This is just bad for the Mayor.

R: And you work where?

U: At a burger joint.

Pedestrians ‡ Bikes | Cars || Cars | Bikes ‡ Pedestrians

Regardless of what Dennis said on last week's It's Always Sunny (great show by the way, if not completely pointless) no you should not ride your bike on the side walk because it is in fact against the law, and your doing so may result in me slashing your bike tires (or a donut thrown at your chest from a speeding vehicle, oh it could happen to you).

You only think I'm joking.

The older I get the better off the world is that I did not go to school to become a cop or there would be a surge in bikers being ticketed and smokers getting random tickets for littering, disturbing the peace, and loitering.

Yet I guess if you are afraid of getting hit by a car (or by a beer bottle) you should probably ride on the sidewalk when it comes to busy streets. Though I am ethically opposed to it I guess it can be excused in the name of less dead bikers.

That is unless you are riding over the Mass Ave Bridge where you don't in fact
have to ride on the sidewalk. Why you ask? Because believe it or not there is a dedicated fucking bike lane! No I can assure you it is not for Smart Cars, its made so people like you don't have to choose between being killed by a car or killing a pedestrian. Consider yourself educated

Consider Yourself Soiled Ol' Glory!

As I have noted before I am taking a "A History of Boston" as one of my final two classes (which I have to pass by the way). In this class there are a couple books I have to read, books I may or may not have read if it were not for this class. The first book I enjoyed very little and concluded that because of it's title, appearance and plot there is very little chance I would have ever read it.

The Soiling of Old Glory by Louis P. Masur catalogs the issues and the incident behind the famous photo by photographer Stanley Forman. It uses the infamous photo to deconstruct the outbreak of racial animosity in Boston during the 1970's so we can better understand why it happened. For me it read much like a 200 page Wikipedia article, informative but at the same time dry and boring.

Having read All Souls by Michael Patrick MacDonald when I was younger I already have a fair grasp on the riots and violence that surrounded the forced busing of the 1970's. What really interested me was the photo, which I have never come across although I have lived in Massachusetts my whole life.

Stanley Forman won a Pulitzer for "Old Glory" which pictures a black man being held while a young white male is poised to strike him with the tip of a pole holding an American flag. The scene takes place in front of Boston City Hall during an anti-busing demonstration which Ted Landmark (the pictured black man) was unfortunate to walk through.


Mr. Forman also won a Pulitzer for a picture he had shot a year prior to his picture of the flag. This picture (shown below) was taken at a fire in Boston, and while taking photos of the scene Mr. Forman took this photo moments after a fire escape gave way and sent the child and woman five floors to the pavement. The woman pictured died as a result of the fall while miraculously the child survived. As a result of this photo, which ran on the front page of the Herald American, Forman was characterized as an oppurtunist who chose to take pictures from safety instead of helping those in trouble. When in fact this very photo led to sweeping reform of Boston fire escape laws which have undoubtedly saved countless lives since.


The book itself is a fairly average book with a glossy cover that borrows heavily from the picture it chronicles. The font used for the title is in all caps with a paint splattering effect which leaves dots of color on the white background. It's simple and lacks originality mostly because the picture was not hard to find when the book is based on said picture.

In the end the photo itself and it's photographer are very interesting and warrant more interest on my part, but the book itself delves heavily into why the photo is visually compelling instead of simply leaving it to the reader to comprehend and providing the setting it was in (which it does but I feel the setting is lost in the details). In all likelihood I would not read this book if it were not for my class, mostly because I know the setting in which this picture took place and all I would need to see is the photo and a brief history of the actual event itself.

I feel like this post can not end so abruptly, so I'm going to dally for a moment.......wait for it........OK, now we can say goodbye.

GOODBYE!

The Grumbling Effects of Hurricane Underling

Because of dinner at the Top of the Hub Restaurant (thanks to a $250 gift card from Katy's boss) and a trip to the Symphony (which we left early because we were falling asleep) we got to dress up yesterday and decided to test out Katy's photo equipment one last time (which resulted in that finger pointing outwards from your screen) before we head to Egypt (yes I'm going to Egypt next week). As a result of this and work (Borders and Broomball the past two days) our apartment looks like this:


(Warning: For all of you who have visited this apartment and remarked on how clean it looks, this may come as a bit of a shock to you. All those with heart conditions, avert your eyes)



And because we are going to see M. Ward tonight (at the Somerville Theater), and I have work Thursday and Friday one should not expect this to start looking cleaner any time soon. So if you thought about breaking in and stealing something I suggest you turn on the lights first.

Only In New England

Would a day like today in February be considered fairly warm but in August it would be considered fairly cold. Six months apart and in the later days of their respective extreme seasons (winter & summer).

On Haircuts

While sitting getting my hair cut at Floyd's today I came to the conclusion that if I am going to spend a decent amount of time in Boston I think it may be a good idea for me to find a specific someone to cut my hair. Ever since leaving for Belgium I have encountered the issue of having my haircut by someone who is not Tony. I have had people who don't speak English, to a guy who just gives you the regular "I'm a white boy" haircut, to a guido who cuts well but almost takes your ear with him, and then there is Floyd's where you can have the same person twice and they wouldn't know any better.

And each time I'm scared I'm going to walk away with an aweful haircut (so far it's about 50/50). So today I officially announce my search for a new barber. It's been a long time coming, and looks to be no small feet in finding one I like considering how I haven't found one as of yet. But I think I'm going about it the wrong way, simply hitting the first place I see. I need to do some research.

All I want is a small shop with a few stools, a TV, moderately priced, and for the barber to be over the age of 40. The last one is the key, because I do not want anything in common with the person cutting my hair. To me getting your haircut is a moment in life when you reflect on things, it's like being in the shower or at the dentist; you sit there in silence and think. I don't want to talk about where I go to school, the Red Sox, Barack Obama, the weather or any of that shit. If I talk about anything with the guy, other than hair, I want it to be about my family, only because I want to have frequented the same place long enough that the guy knows my family.

And above all I want to walk in, sit down, and get my haircut the exact way I like it without having to show him pictures, explain what shampoo I use or how I comb my hair (for the record I don't). I want this guy to know my hair, and just do what needs to be done.

If your interested or have a suggestion, reply to this post.

Of inner city lakes, beer and Eric Lindros

I have said it before and I will say it again, I should have gone to school in Florida.

I know you people in Alaska, Minnesota, Canada, and Siberia (Scandinavia your standard of living is too high to complain) experience terribly cold winters, and I am sorry for that but you have nothing on New England weather. We may not get many below zero days as you do but in all do respect 33 degrees and sleeting is the worst experience in the world.

Yesterday started out as a decent winter day, high 20s and snowing. I'm ok with that, because snow is not wet, unless you get it inside your clothing. Of course the day didn't stay that way, not in land of 75 degree days in January! Oh no, because when I emerged from Spanish it was sleeting! I'm fine with the sleet itself, so what if I get soaked to the bone but at the same time I'm turning blue with cold, it's really the lakes that develop along the sides of each street. Lakes varying from 1 inch to 1 foot deep and because of all the icebergs floating on the surface you have no idea how deep they are until your leg is halfway submerged.

Needless to say the Odyssey back home, back to NEU, and then back home again was fairly taxing. On the journey I went through two coats, a pair of gloves, countless socks, two sweatshirts, and a pair of pants. Terrible right? Couldn't possibly get worse right?

Wrong!

Because that is only half of why days like yesterday are terrible. Days like yesterday include above freezing temperatures and rain which leads to the washing away of all the salt laid down throughout the course of the day. Then, as night arrives, the temperatures drop below freezing and because of the non-existent salt every surface freezes over. Including the sidewalk in front of my apartment.

Well as all of you know I supervise Broomball most nights during the week. This requires me to leave my apartment at about 9:30 PM.

Leave at precisely 9:30 PM I did just that, and about 9:31 PM I found myself lying flat on my back staring up at some guy with a case of beer in his hand saying "are you all right?"

Now this has happened only once before in my life (staring up from my back into someones face wondering how I got myself into such a predicament), and that is when I was 6. What happened? Let's just say there is a reason why at the YMCA pool (and most pools for that matter) they have signs that say RUNNING IS NOT PERMITTED.

Of course this time I got right up, made a few jokes with the guy about the ice and how maybe I should go get a case of beer and call in. Then I walked (carefully) down to Marino and made light of what happening, worked and then went home to sleep.

I'm starting to think that that last part was probably not a smart idea, because ever since the fall my head has been hurting quite a bit and I don't distinctly remember falling last night (just the lying on my back). Which would lead me to believe that I have a concussion, albeit probably a very minor one (still you shouldn't sleep after a concussion). If that was indeed a concussion like I think it was that would bring my total concussion total up to 5 (that being said only one two were severe in my opinion and two, including the one last night, are suspect).

In order they are:

- Pool incident (severe)
- Falling off of a 6 foot wall and slamming my head against the side walk and left me puking all night
- Being hit so hard into the boards in hockey that I blacked out for a few seconds (severe)
- Passing out while going pee in my upstairs bathroom, which resulted in me waking up with a pulsating skull from my head striking the toilet. The fainting occurred because I was immobile for about 2 hours or so watching Man on Fire (great movie) and then suddenly standing up and running up the stairs to go the bathroom.
- Finally last nights fall.

I'm a regular Eric Lindros aren't I?

That being said if I end up being a vegetable thanks to all my concussions New England weather can be partially to blame and can expect a phone call from my lawyer.

Twitter me this.

So my check bounced today. Not just any old check, but a check from the City of Boston. A payroll check for close to $200. I was kind of counting on that money, money that I was given counter credit for. So what I'm really saying is is that this is not cool. Because I no longer work at the BRA this is going to cause me to call my boss on Monday and ask her to help me deal with this instead of me emailing HR from my office email which would have been much easier. Also I was expecting another $200 check to come in tomorrow which now I will be worried it will bounce.

I mean how does the City of Boston using Paychex bounce a fucking check? How is that possible? I mean I know I was the lowest of the low in my department and if anyone is going to miss out on money it's going to be the kid who USED to work there, but come on.

Sorry I just couldn't adequately describe my frustration in a Tweet.

The thing about Co-Op is.....

They don't prepare you for the transition from the working world back to classes. They do everything in their power to push you out into the real world with a Co-Op but when you return you are expected to assimilate back into campus like you never left. Don't get me wrong, I love the Co-Op program and it is the reason why I decided on Northeastern over a much more affordable state school but there is nothing quite like the transition that takes place between the two spheres. For myself it has been over a year since a attended a class at Northeastern, what with my Co-Op and before that my study abroad program in Belgium I haven't set foot in a Northeastern classroom since last December.

A week ago I was waking up 5 days a week taking the T to my office and getting paid for 8 hours a day. Now I have class from 9 - 3 (which I pay for, instead of getting paid) in which I do more work than I would have on Co-Op. On top of that I will have homework which will fill up more of my time as well as a need to fill the void of my meager, yet weekly, BRA paycheck with hours of harder work at Borders and about equal difficulty (not saying much) work as an IM official. I never thought I would say this but being in the real world is significantly less stressful and much less physically demanding than being a student.

Many of you (many is not a word to describe the amount of readers I have but it's in the past now and we all know there is no going back) may scoff at such a notion but consider this. Every day I am incurring more debt through payments via loans to Northeastern and accruing interest on past loans while at the same time I am trying to pass the classes I am paying for the privilege to attend. On top of which I am working two jobs trying to keep from having to take out loans to afford to live on my own and feed myself.

As opposed to life working 40 hours a week. You go to work at 9, work, punch out at 5 and come home. No homework, no second job, just life. Granted it's not as easy as I just made it sound, but there is no University expense on top of that.

To put it bluntly, my lifestyle just changed overnight from a member of the global economy to a student with not enough time in the day to get by and my University, and life for that matter, expects me to just roll with it.

An Everlasting Peace.

The Underling is officially no longer an employee of the City of Boston.

It should be noted that in his final hours in office he was able to successfully engineer a long and everlasting peace between himself and the Coke Machine on the condition that he never attempt to purchase a Coke from the Machine again.

Top Five: The Day of Days

The Underling does not enjoy last days at all. They make him paranoid, antsy, and above they bring about his Catholic Guilt. So in honor of his last day working for the BRA we are proud to bring you the Underlings top five most awkward/memorable last days. Today we will actually go in reverse to build up some excitement and intrigue!


5. Tie between working for my father and Northeastn Intramurals. I am still off an on with both so this doesn't really count but I needed a #5.

European Parliament: Stagiere to Pawel Piskorski:
There was really nothing awkward about this day other than the hug and good bye with Weronika and the obvious absence of my boss. What really hit me about this day was that I was leaving Belgium shortly there after, a place I could have spent the rest of my life and been happy about it. A very emotional day, the most emotional last day I have had, to say the least.

Enos Marine:
My first job ever and coincidentally it was my first last day ever! This last day was awkward because my boss thought that I should work for 2 more weeks and then go to college. I on the other hand thought that I needed two weeks to get my shit together and fully deal with the fact that I was moving on. She thought it was irresponsible, I thought it was normal. Regardless to this day it is difficult to talk to my old boss when I take my father's boat out.


Secretary of the Commonwealth Corporations Division:
I consider this awkward because I avoided saying good bye to every member of the Corporations division (40 people) on my way out. How I did that I have no clue, but it was glorious.

Woodman's of Essex:
This job takes the cake when it comes to awkward memorable last days. All in all it was a few last days wrapped into one because of all the titles I held here. What makes it so memorable is that at Woodman's it is tradition to be thrown into the lobster tank out front on your last day. I was no exception. The entire day I was a nervous wreck waiting to be thrown into the tank (which is something like 40 degrees Fahrenheit) while my co-workers kept snickering at me and making gestures that implied that I would be getting really wet later that evening.

Now I'm a good guy and if I don't say so myself a rather cute one, something that worked in my favor at Woodman's because at least half of the workers are High School girls. And on my last day that worked in my favor. With a few minutes before close a couple of the girls told me to leave and that they would punch me out so I could avoid getting dunked in the tank. I took them up on their offer and was out the door only to realize I forgot my regular shoes, which I had to go back for. That of course was my undoing. I was immediately grabbed and dragged out to the tank, at this point I decided I would not go down without a fight. I kicked my legs and swung my arms breaking someones glasses and knocking someone else to the ground, but to no avail, I went in the tank. I then drove home without any pants on.

My plan of leaving early would not have worked btw because earlier that day the other guys in the kitchen went out and blocked me in with their cars. That would have brought upon a situation where I would have waited out my co-workers until the wee hours of the morning then would have snuck off and called someone to come pick me up. Oh if only that had happened.

And We're Back with some Grumblings

Well after an action packed Christmas that made my Christmas post seem almost prophetic I am back to my blogging ways. The events of Christmas do need to be noted in some form but I do not know in what type of medium to bring it to you. All in good time though.

In other news Eric's birthday proved to be uneventful by Eric/Danny standards. Though I did have my first scorpion bowl which proved to be both tasty and dangerous. Because of work today I made an early exit to ensure I would not be hungover while serving the book loving populace.

Speaking of which today I get to work for 4 hours, that is down from 8. I kind of hope that is a mix up and not a permanent thing because if I am working 4 hour shifts once or twice a week that may prove to be a problem. Stay tuned.

I also attended the Nutcracker yesterday with Katy, which involved two bars and roughly 4 beers over a few hour span. Needless to say I enjoyed myself.

Lastly my Co-Op with the BRA will be ending this Wednesday (sad face) which means some awkward good byes and a shift in life priorities which means blogging will either skyrocket or cease because of a workload. I'm hoping for the former.

Normally this is where on most blogs people wish you a happy New Year and say that they have a whole bunch of fun things planned for their readers in 2009 (weird to think this decade is almost over already). Well I have nothing planned for you, I'm sorry. You will just have to trust that I will come up with things on the fly or make the old things that much more enjoyable to keep pace. Regardless I hope you continue to come back in 2009, I will still be here, I hope.

Office Appliances

I'm about ready to go Michael Bolton on about 10 different pieces of Office Equipment right now.

Why is it that all Office Equipment (at least all Office Equipment I have ever worked with) either is incredibly outdated (my computer), makes a high pitched screech (the copier) or simply refuses to work the way it is supposed to (no specific example because everything here malfunctions). I mean really I should have two screens, a faster processor and 1 GB of ram on this thing and my job would be far easier, cheaper and propably eliminate another employee. It's infuraiating.

The real source of my anger is the copier which occasionally makes this really high pitched sound that would drive a dog insane. The first time it took me 20 minutes to locate it and then shut down the machine. Now I only have to get up and shut the machine off everytime it happens because I know who the culprit is. But still I want to bring a baseball bat in to work.

I was debating putting this on Twitter but then my Twitter went down.

I successfully got around having the "You did a fine job, and we will miss you" conversation with my boss's boss (Trish's boss Christine) today by leaving the meeting immediately and hiding in the men's room for about 10 minutes.

I'm dreading my final day and I am dreading having to fill out my evaluation with Trish and any other surprises that come my way. I should just call in sick on my last day. Then again that would be an awkward phone call.

More on this later.

Thank you for the phone call Northeastern...

but I haven't had a final at NU in over a year now. But yes I will be sure to check MyNeu (that's another post onto itself) to make sure my non-existent finals are still where they were scheduled to be; my couch. Glad to see my $40,000 a year is wasted so well.

Of Snow Days, Mayor Menino and Non-Essential Employees

As you may already be aware, from the nonstop media coverage, there is to be a lot of snow upon the ground on this fine 19th day of the 12th month in the 2008 year of our Lord Jesus Christ (what?). And because of this fine weather development, Mayor Thomas Menino has granted the Underling, because of his fine work, a much needed day off. It is of course unfortunate that every other non-essential employee was also given the day off because of the impending storm, it seems as if I can never enjoy things by myself.

Because of said storm, there was much rejoicing. Also there was breakfast at Charlie's! I had rasberry pancakes (3) with a side of toast and a chocolate milk. Katy had ONE pancake and a side breakfast potatoes. This is what it looked like when the meal was finished.



Keep in mind who had what and what is finished on the table and what is not. I say no more.

I would like to thank Mayor Menino for the delicious breakfast that I was able to have today. Though it would have been that much better if he picked up the tab, but I understand.

Since Mother Nature has blessed me with a day off today expect a few posts today. Possibly a top five will be in the mix! Be prepared!

Inside Voices

I now know why the Northeastern Co-Op gets this specific cubicle, the Engineers love to hold loud impromptu meetings right next to it. It would be one thing if the person I am talking to on the phone shouted their half of the conversation, but since her employees follow the "Inside Voices Directive" handed down by their respective Kindergarten teachers she does not see a reason to violate the rule herself.

Grumbling Along.....

As many of you have undoubtedly realized I have gone on something of a posting binge since I remembered I had a blog a couple weeks ago (I'm sorry, I give you permission to hit the mark all as read button up at the top of your RSS reader) but within that binge (can I say that?) I have seriously neglected to include any real grumbling about being an underling. I say to you, No More (Said like the actress in the Count of Monte Christo)! Here are some grumblings, from me, The Underling.


Grumbling #1
You know what really gets my goat (I have always wanted to use that phrase in context, I have others as well so watch out!)? People who do not replace the water in the water cooler. But you know what I enjoy doing more than most any other mundane, not fun, slightly irritating thing in an office environment? No it's not talk to my coworkers about politics, it's changing the water for the water cooler!

So I have a sort of dilemma, on one hand I want to chop the hands off of those who do not replace the empty water jug, and on the other hand I love replacing the empty water jug (for the sole purpose that that means that something has been deminished and completed, I don't know what it is but I love that feeling). So far I have been just enjoying the replacing because the other option is slightly bloody and may get me fired, which means I would really be in trouble with Kari (not to mention I think Sallie May may [Ha!] call in my loans and I don't have $60,000 at the moment despite my success) and I don't want that. Suggestions?


Grumbling#2
I walked into the break room today to clean out my Tupperware from lunch (I just have to cut back on those high profile luncheons, it's the economy, even us Underlings have been effected) and as I passed by the sink to the trash I realized that we have a garbage disposal! Why was I not alerted to this? Why did it take me 5 1/2 months to discover this? Do you understand how I would not have had to bring home dirty tupperware every day? Just because I am an intern doesn't mean I need not be included in such developments as a garbage disposal! That goes for the expansive supply closet I didn't know we had. I need to leave a long list of things for the incoming intern including garabage disposal, supply closet, Bill, the Coke Machine, and the ability to take Agency cars.

Sugar Plum Fairy, Sugar Plum Fairy

Picture by Katy Kobzeff

Out the door
Grab the paper
Down the steps
Pause
Turn right up the street
Massachusetts Avenue
Turn right
Windy
Remove newspaper from bag
Throw away bag
Avoid Berkee students
Cough
Pause at intersection
Watch Traffic
Jog across street
Cop with a machine gun
Enter station
"Do you have any change?"
Head down
Down flight of stairs.
Remove wallet
Scan
Through gate
Right
Down a flight
Left
Down two flights
Walk 10 paces
Pause
"Sally was a 15 year old girl from Nebraska!"
Open newspaper
Battle Unfolds in a Poor Land For the Riches Beneath the Soil
Lights
Board train
Walk to the back
Sit on steps
"Next Stop Copley"
Wet floor
Niger
"Entering Copley"
The Railroad Disability Board That Couldn't Say No
"Copley, the destination of this train is, Government Center"
Long Island Rail Road
Chicago
Check watch
9:37
"Entering Arlington"
President Dodges Shoes in Iraq
Chuckle
Blury passengers
"Boylston, the destination of this train is, Government Center"
Sneeze
Wrestle newspaper
A Buddy Ballot System
Nebraska
Maine
Doors open
Stand up
Disembark train
"Park Street, the destina.........."
Right
Walk up platform
Train arriving
Hustle down stairs
Disregard every other step
Jog to second car
Enter first door
Walk to back of car
Do Not Lean Against Door
Lean against door
Think better of it
Lean against other door
"Downtown Crossing, the destination of this train is, Braintree"
Sounds like Godfrey
Exit car
Move to third car
Cut a lady off
Embarrassed
Enter car
Find seat
"Officer gets me naturalized!"
The 17th Floor, Where Wealth Went to Vanish in a Manhattan Tower
$50 billion
New York Mets
Florida Retirees
"Entering South Station"
Stand up
Move to first door
Stop
Exit train
Right
Up escalator
Walk up left side
SL2 BMIP
Board bus
Singles seats full
Sit down
"Not A Crime!"
As the Economy Falters, Obama's Goodwill Grows
Don't hit the man in front of you with the paper
7 of 10 Americans support Obama
Knee is uncomfortable
"Courthouse Station"
Need to buy lunch today
Girl
Sunglasses
Subway
Stupid
"World Trade Center Station"
William Kristol
Light
Check watch
9:52 AM
Starbucks
"..my wedding was about to start!"
"Silver Line Way"
Wrestle newspaper
Fold
Girl has three bags
Bewilderment
"Please be considerate and yield seats to elderly and disabled"
Harpoon
I like UFO
"Stop requested"
Check belongings
Stand up
"Tide Street"
Walk to door
Pause
Exit
Check watch
9:59 AM
Walk across grass
Open door
Remove Wallet
Scan
Replace Wallet
Climb 2 flights of stairs
Retard
Every time
Remove Wallet
Scan
Replace Wallet
Enter office.



That's my commute.